International Travel for Work? YES! Er, Wait...

Contribution by Kate Hoeppel

From the road: Agra, Kabusanji, Taipei

If there was a test to weed out seasoned travelers from those less savvy, I probably wouldn't make the cut. I blame laziness. It takes a lot of time and research to craft a good trip! But I realized a few months ago that I actually do a fair bit of traveling for my job to some interesting places, and while this travel is funded and scheduled by my employer, it is still travel. Below are some stories, tips and ramblings for your enjoyment.

• If some sadistic travel agent books you a seat directly next to your boss for a 10+ hour flight, just walk right up there and explain it to the ticketing agent. They will usually give you an understanding smile and be able to move you. Polite excuses can come later. Warning: this can backfire. You may think you’re lucky being moved to an empty row until three hours into the flight two drunken newlyweds, a crying baby, or some other variety of Balrog sits down next to you spilling various substances. Sometimes I don't even move anymore… better to stick with the devil you know.
• In general, I just say yes to any and all outings suggested by my hosts. Sometimes you score and get to see behind the scenes at an ancient Buddhist temple! Other times you score slightly less and get invited to a wedding of someone you have never met that is two hours away (without traffic).
• If you're going somewhere off the beaten path for only a couple of days, most of which will be spent in meetings or other events, you don't really have the luxury of eating whatever you want. Think about it… the only thing worse than being sick while traveling is being sick while traveling for work. Muster up your inner resolve, repeatedly request bottled water, and feign a fear of multiple foods that frequent the “naughty list.” I should add that usually the people I am meeting with are beyond considerate of our health, and for that I am eternally grateful. However, there's always that one person who just randomly gets you something from a street vendor right outside a garbage dump and he REALLY wants you to try it, oh YOU HAVE TO TRY IT!!! You are a vision of graciousness and roll the dice. Just drink some Peptol that night.
• Along the same vein, if you indicate an appreciation for any type of local delicacy, be fully prepared to have vats of it supplied for you throughout the trip. Sounds like heaven I know, but this too can backfire! Being “over served” fancy red wine at dinner may be delightful, but being treated to countless hookah bars at 3am under severe jet lag may not.
• I stopped worrying about losing my luggage some time ago. The honest truth is that even if you carry a full suit with you on your flight, it probably won’t get you comfortably through a three-day conference. At least not with theater-style plenary seating, harrumph. Instead I just say a few words to the God of Forgotten Things and wear something comfy on the plane. If/when I lose my luggage I’m fully planning on just going AWOL. Especially if it’s anywhere with “European Sizes.”
• Lastly, if you fall asleep while talking to someone at dinner, there really is nothing to say. Just apologize and check to see if you drooled. In some cultures, it may even be considered cute!